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Thinking of before, losing sleep
Wishing, wanting, needing, not here
Pushing away, my thoughts are elsewhere.
I am going through the motions, keeping afloat while still taking on water.
Losing the battle, drowning is next.

Depression?

So I am not sure what is really going on with me right now. Since moving to Vermont, I have been mostly happy. Then after we closed on our house, and were settled and moved in I became immensely homesick, and a bit depressed. Currently I am still kind of depressed, and if it was possible I would pack up a truck and go back to Utah.

Cage the Elephant

Just picked up a copy of their debut album on EMI record. I have to say, the Elephant has been let out of the cage. They are a true rock band, keeping the blues roots of rock n' roll alive and well. Some of you may say, "but he is rapping." No, he is singing the blues. Have you ever heard of John Lee Hooker?
The album opens up with hard hitting white trash blues number. The second song has a bit more of a pop/rock feel, and is a slight letdown. The third track, "Ain't no rest for the wicked," brings it all back into focus...
There are definitely some allusions to the White Stripes, and maybe even Panic at the Disco.
Overall the album is a good listen, I would recommend it. If they stick more to the blues end of the spectrum they will go far..

Lift Tickets

I find it absurd that ski resorts out east are charging so much for lift tickets..considering how small they are and how little snow they get..Seriously Mt. Snow in southern vermont..avg snowfall 160 inches...skiable terrain less than 600 acres..lift tickets $75.
Stowe...skiable acres 485, avg snowfall only 333", lift tickets $84...
Jay Peak... skiable acres 385, avg snowfall 350"...lift tickets $67
Killington...skiable acres 750, avg snowfall 250"...lift tickets $82
Let's compare to skiing out west..na..how about just Utah...
Snowbird...skiable acres 2500, avg snowfall 500" (though the last two years they have been close to 700)...lift tickets $62.
Alta...skiable acres 2200, avg snowfall 500+...lift tickets $66.
Even Solitude, one of Utah's "smaller" resorts has over 1200 acres of terrain, gets over 500 inches of snow, and lift tickets, $62...that is if you actually buy them at the mountain and don't get discount tickets, basically anywhere.
So really...the northeast needs a reality check. I feel bad for the skiers who never get to go out west and experience real mountains.

Finally

Foliage season is over, the tourists have tapered off, and I am finally getting two days off a week...yes, for the past three months I have been working six days a week. The overtime pay has been great, but I have been exhausted. All I can say now is, "bring on the snow."

More than the other

I had a thought the other day, a thought I never expected to have. I would sell my motorcycle so we had some extra cash if we were moving back to Utah in the future...yes..I actually thought of giving up my bike for epic powder.
Because of this, I have come to the realization that I am truly a skier. Yes I love riding, but I like skiing more...I guess it is because I can always buy another motorcycle..but consistent powder days only happen in Utah...I use to be an obsessive dancer...but I can dance anywhere...Being happy on snow is the best feeling on earth..

As I said in an earlier post, I was never actually miserable in SLC. I just made myself believe I was. The people there, weird though they may be, are at least friendly, and make an effort. Yeah I know, I am still just missing home.
I don't see anything wrong with that.

Pray for snow

Snow

Yes, snow will be a constant and ongoing theme in my blog...Even in the off season. When it comes down to it, I only see the year as having two seasons. Ski season, and training for ski season. Ski season starts as early in the fall as possible, and if the weather cooperates runs through at least late April. Training for ski season starts as soon as the other ends, which includes a lot of high elevation hiking, lunges, running, cycling, etc...Having two dogs helps a lot...they need to go for long walks...which involve climbing a 5000 foot mountain in 4 hours..up and down. Mountain biking with them, and running. Also since I have become somewhat of a telemark skier, lots and lots of lunges at the gym.
The Wasatch mountain range in Utah has received over two feet of snow already...it is being used...I saw pictures...I am severely jealous...I am still waiting for the snow here...I am told it is coming..but I don't see it..as always, pray for snow...
peace

Homesick...

I know it's been a while since I have written anything...life has been hectic, the summer was long and mostly rainy here in the northeast, and we are looking forward to Winter already. We have bought a house here in the state of Vermont. In the village of Essex Junction, just outside of Burlington. It is a 4 bedroom cape style home, with a nice size yard, in a nice neighborhood. Not too far from anything, but just far enough that the four colleges and universities in the area are not a bother.
I have mixed feeling about the whole thing right now. I am 3000 miles away from anything I know. My parents, long time friends, and the west...I look at pictures, and my heart is slightly saddened. I have never been truly homesick, but I believe this is what I am feeling. The western US and its' 10 states were my home for 28 years of my life. I would hear a story, and know I had been there. I miss how tightly held the dancers are there. Las Vegas, Los Angeles, San Diego, San Francisco, Sac, PDX, Seattle, SLC, Denver, Phoenix...these were all just part of a larger group of friends. So far the dance scene here is disappointing at best, and disheartening at its' worst. As much as I complained about SLC, I truly was happy there...I just didn't know it until I was gone. Sure the drivers were a bit off, and the people were a bit wacky..but the snow was just like heaven, and the mountains were a sight to wake up to. Yes, I know there are "mountains" here also...I still just see them as the green hills..barely reaching the sky at 5,000 feet. SLC was at almost that height.
I have always known that I am able to be happy in just about any situation, and make the best of it. So, who knows what the future holds. Maybe UT will once again be graced with our presence on its' glorious fluffy slopes. Only time will tell.
But for now, I am homesick, and a bit lost...here's to hoping all is not lost.

-Tim...